Goodbye Jan, Hello Feb!

Well, thank goodness that is over with for another year then.

There are many reasons why January is my least favourite month of the year.

The first being that it is usually when I am at my fattest.  Or fullest of figure, if you prefer.

I tend to drop about half a pound in each of the months leading up to December, by which time I am then raring to chase those bad boys back down and insist they return to their designated position on my stomach and thighs…  plus encourage them to invite a few extra pounds along to camp out on each bum cheek and bingo wing.

If they show any resistance at all, I simply ply them with more Quality Street, red wine, mince pies and trifle.  I am very considerate like that.

Incidentally, this is also why December is up there as one of my favourite months of the year.

But anyway, back to dreary Jan.  She really is a miserable bitch so-and-so.

Everywhere I look, people are gloomily eating salads and running around parks in sub-zero temperatures.

Supermarket shelves are stocked with bottles of wine that nobody is drinking (well I am, obviously – I have yet to subscribe to the notion of ‘Dry January’).

Resolutions are made.  Usually ones that involve you having to stop doing the things you love.

In January, everything is bad for you.  Everyone is full of cold.  Days are dark, wet and cold.  Bank accounts are well and truly dwindled.

I am not usually one to wish my life away, but I can’t help but count down the days from January to February.

In February, days are longer and brighter.  Bank accounts have been replenished.  Friends go back to drinking wine together.  Exercise feels more of a joy than a chore.  Well, maybe not a joy exactly, but it is definitely more bearable.

People are smiling again.

It is the month of love.

It is only 28 days long.

Goodbye Jan, hello Feb.

*****

Nominations are now open for the 2013 MAD Blog Awards.  I was thrilled to be a finalist in the 2012 awards for Best Family Fun Blog and would love to be there again this year.  Obviously, I’d be chuffed to bits to be nominated in any of the categories, but think I stand the best chance in Best Family FunBest Family Life or Most Entertaining Blog.  You can click here to nominate and will need my blog URL – http://grenglish.co.uk

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