Grenglish, Health & Happiness, Life, Me
comments 44

In Your Face

I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday, not just to guide a face wipe over day-old mascara or while absent-mindedly brushing my hair, but I really looked at myself.

I examined my face from grey-roots to neck.  I pulled at my cheeks, lifted the skin around my eyes and turned my mouth up and down.

Who was this woman staring back at me, the one with the silver stripe along her crown and a forehead that wrinkled when she strained to take a closer look?

Her skin looks redder than I remember and when I stretch it this way and that, it takes a few seconds to fall back into place.  Both her eyebrows are flecked with grey and she appears to be growing a third… on her chin.  Her eyes look a bit bleary, probably because she had two glasses of wine the night before; and the dark circles beneath them are there because she never sleeps well after wine.

It is me, but not the me I remember.

The last time I looked, really looked, my skin seemed brighter, plumper and smoother. My hair was tamer, and although there was an occasional shimmer of silver in the wrong light, it was an otherwise enviable mane.  It was a face that did not mould into the pillow overnight and had never been tweezed below the eye.  It did not require expensive cleansers or tinted moisturisers to look healthy and if #selfies had been invented then, they’d be #nofilter.  It was a wonderfully adaptable face that I took for granted.

But, I like my new face much more.

It is the face of someone who has lived for over 40-years.  The lines around my eyes are from decades of laughing, and the creases in my cheeks have been kissed a thousand times.  This face has a family to love. It lights up in the company of friends and can break into a smile without really trying. It is the only face my son has ever known.

I am proud of every wrinkle, every fold and every groove.  If you traced your finger over them, they would tell you the story of my life.

It is a privilege to wear this face.



  1. I very often walk past a window or a mirror and catch sight of myself and think “that’s not what I look like”. I have an image in my head and it is not the same as the reflection looking back. I am not sure I am quite as at ease with her as you are xxx
    Donna @ Little Lilypad Co recently posted…My child has asthma : what do I do?My Profile

    • Haha thank you lovely! The greys I admit to touching up every few weeks but the rest I am good with 🙂

    • In my head, I am still in twenties too. I feel no different in that respect but looking at my face properly was interesting!

  2. So lovely to read words from someone who is clearly very comfortable in their own skin. Sadly, I usually look in the mirror and criticise my appearance. I’m not a huge fan of the lines but I’d better get used to them!

  3. I am so scared to really look at myself. These days I don’t even put make up on so have no real reason to do so….but you are so right….and the way you put in words its just beautiful!
    Otilia recently posted…My little,my world…My Profile

  4. just popping over from ‘tots100: be inspired’ and am so glad I did. I am due to turn 40 next year and I admit it is a prospect I find daunting. I love this post and its sentiment that growing older is growing better. I will try to hold on to that when the big 4-o arrives!

  5. Aw I love this post Sarah. I often look at myself and think good grief I am looking older. But you are a right. Every line and wrinkle, every eye bag even, just serves to tell a story. Such a brilliantly written post and congrats on being a BIBS finalist- totally deserved. x
    Katie @mummydaddyme recently posted…A Week in our Lives- May 2015My Profile

    • We can all be so hard on ourselves at times. My body is what it is, I have accepted it will never again be the same as it was 20-years ago but I still miss my old skin/tummy/thighs!

    • You have not changed a bit since I have known you and still look early 40s to me! It’s how you wear your face that counts and yours is full of positivity and love x

  6. Pingback: Ugly – Grenglish

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