All posts tagged: life

In Your Face

I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday, not just to guide a face wipe over day-old mascara or while absent-mindedly brushing my hair, but I really looked at myself. I examined my face from grey-roots to neck.  I pulled at my cheeks, lifted the skin around my eyes and turned my mouth up and down. Who was this woman staring back at me, the one with the silver stripe along her crown and a forehead that wrinkled when she strained to take a closer look? Her skin looks redder than I remember and when I stretch it this way and that, it takes a few seconds to fall back into place.  Both her eyebrows are flecked with grey and she appears to be growing a third… on her chin.  Her eyes look a bit bleary, probably because she had two glasses of wine the night before; and the dark circles beneath them are there because she never sleeps well after wine. It is me, but not the me I remember. The last time I looked, really looked, my skin seemed brighter, …

Like Father, like son

My husband and son have many things in common. They would both happily spend the entire day in their pyjamas if they could. Every rainy Saturday afternoon is as a DVD box set opportunity. They laugh at their own jokes. Neither one likes to be offered ‘suggestions’ while constructing Lego. They can both smell a square of chocolate from a mile away. They believe that whoever shouts loudest gets his way. Dancing is their moment to showcase made-up karate chops and spin kicks. But, there is one other thing they have in common that drives me nuts.  I could be chopping veg in the kitchen, tidying toys away in the playroom, or actually be in the shower, when I hear my name called, followed by a question that usually starts with ‘Can you get me…’, ‘Where is the…’, or ‘What’s for…’ If I do not respond in a timely manner, my name and the accompanying question will simply be repeated at a higher volume, usually from the comfort of the sofa or bed where they are no doubt reclining at the time. I have abandoned risottos, skipped crucial …

Offline

I have been a bit quiet of late. On here, at home, in life. There is nothing wrong, not really.  Just sometimes, being around people, online and offline, can feel a bit exhausting. Recently, I’ve taken some time back for myself. I have been here before you see; but not understanding myself or my body well enough then was partly responsible for some of the more drastic decisions I have made in my life.  Feeling stifled in a job, a friendship, or a relationship is not really reason enough to up roots and escape to the other side of the world.  Although, I certainly do not regret that time, now that I am a married mother in my (early) forties, I thought I should learn to recognise the signs of impending social burnout and manage it like a grown-up. I think I come across as quite a sociable person and for the most part, I suppose that I am.  I do genuinely enjoy the company of family and friends, but I work very hard to appear as chatty and outgoing as people often perceive me to be, and I …

Dad’s Home!

The Greek God(zilla) is back from his stint in Brazil and has wasted no time at all in resuming all of his favourite activities; watching football, sleeping and lighting the barbecue. This means that time has also been called on the mini spa break I was having of my own as I resume all of my usual activities; picking socks up from the bedroom floor, listening to the constant whir of the washing machine, and being expected to participate in conversations about football. Although, all of that ME time was starting to get a little bit boring anyway. Our son has wasted no time in picking up where he left off too.  The Greek God(zilla) was barely through the door before being jumped on and asked for presents.  Then, it was all about Daddy.  There was nothing I could do to please our 4-year old. He did not want me to read him stories, help brush his teeth, talk to him in the bath, or give him breakfast. Only Daddy would do. For everything! If the Greek God(zilla) went upstairs …

As Good As It Gets

When you are a young child, you talk about what you would like to be when you grow up. You dream big – astronaut, writer, doctor, fireman, landscape gardener, gymnast, politician, deep-sea diver, rock star, teacher, Queen of your own country; or perhaps even all of the above… *coughs* As you enter your teenage years, maybe you start to think about who you will marry.  In my case, it was Michael J Fox and briefly Ralph Macchio, circa The Karate Kid Part 1. Or maybe you will decide that marriage is an outdated institution and not for you at all. I swayed between the two for many years. You explore yourself. You get a sense of who you will become and perhaps more importantly, who you will not. I quickly realised I did not have the education or patience to be a teacher, a doctor, or an astronaut. I did not have the courage of a fireman or a deep-sea diver, the flexibility of a gymnast, or the bloodline to be Queen. I did not have …