As the title suggests, I have burnt my tongue.
I think it happened a few days ago, although I can’t actually remember doing it, I’ve just had a burning sensation ever since then, and on thorough inspection in the rear view mirror, I noticed a few little bumps around the tip . I am assuming the culprit to be a grande decaf skinny wet latte, or pepperoni pizza.
It doesn’t seem to be getting any better either. It’s not just how sore it feels (and it fricking KILLS), it is now also affecting my ability to taste food! So much so, that I finished eating lunch when I felt full yesterday (only about halfway through!), rather than shoveling the whole plate in because it tasted soooo good. I am hoping the demise of my taste buds will have a positive effect on the waistline. There has to be some law of the universe that will see this right?!
On reflection, the salt and vinegar crisps were a big mistake. That was quite some sting and I think set me back another few days. Hot drinks are obviously a definite no-no, so I’ve had to get my caffeine fix from chocolate. Milk is quite soothing, and so is cool yoghurt. Fortunately, I am not lactose intolerant. Yet.
I’ve tried ignoring it, I’ve tried bonjela, I’ve tried ibuprofen, I’ve tried mouthwash (ouch!), I’ve tried alcohol (applied directly to the area by way of gulping) and I’ve tried sticking a bag of frozen peas on the tip. I even licked an icepack when I got home from work yesterday, desperation overtaking shame.
Someone at work, we’ll call her Emma, recommended sitting with my tongue poked out for 3-minutes to dry it out, insisting it would relieve the pain and make the little bumps go away.
Emma and I are not friends anymore.
When I woke up this morning and felt like a hundred new blisters had formed in my sleep, I was ready to chop my own tongue off.
Instead, I stopped by a chemist on the way in to work and flashed my tongue at the pharmacist, who recommended a tube of iglu and advised me to apply it liberally after food, but as my tongue was on fire, I just slathered it all over as soon as I got back to the car. The relief hit me instantly and I have found new hope in this little 8g tube of gel.
Now, we just wait and see…
Any other soothing tips that won’t make me look like a total wally? (I’m still not speaking to you, Emma)